No real theme this week, just some random groaners to tide you through the weekend.
Historian Drew W. wonders "I'm not sure which is weirder: the fact that Verizon has a bunch of numbers after it or that AT&T seems to be stuck in roughly 2013 (when Sprint killed the Nextel network for good)."
"It wasn't helpful," grouses Willy of His Majesty's Mailfolk. "Are they trying to tell me they no longer deliver?"
An anonymous immortal figures "With the power of compounding interest, I should be a zillionaire!" Disregarding the zero initial balance, sure.
A different anonymous hockey fan coolly comments "That's why you need a dry run ;-)" complete with winky.
Finally, surnameless Kim find's Oracle's metrics coming up short. "Why does Oracle need to be so negative about my virtual machine's performance?"
This post originally appeared on The Daily WTF.